Hard to believe that in a few short months we will be parents. We find ourselves many times looking at each other and saying, “hey, you are going to be a mother!” “Hey, you are going to be a father!” We still can’t quite believe it. Do all to-be-fathers feel this way? Perhaps that is why there are nine months to get ready.
One of the most common questions here in Shanghai, when people find out that Michelle is pregnant, is “What do you prefer? Girl or boy?” I guess we ask this too in America but somehow here it seems different.
Most people know in China that Chinese want boys and not girls. Even though that idea is out dated today and reserved for those country side people, it is still somehow a big part of life here in Shanghai. One of the obvious signs that this feeling still exists is that ultrasounds to find out the gender of the baby is illegal here in China. Many times even foreigners will ask us this, “do you want to know if you’ll have a boy or a girl?” To this we respond, “we can’t, it’s illegal here in China. But we want to be surprised anyway.” For me, the husband, I would love a little Chinese girl. My wife though, she wants a little foreign boy. Perhaps we’ll have to settle for mixed up baby…neither western or Chinese, just a little bit of both.
We’ve been thinking of possible names for our newborn. This will prove to be a difficult task. We’ve decided that we want two names. A Chinese name and an English name. But I’ve given the Chinese naming process to my wife since I think of some names and they all sound bad or sound like bad things. This will be a learning process for me. But the English names are my job. I’ve thought of a few. There is one big thing I have to think about is whether or not my mother and father in law will be able to pronounce the child’s name. I want to think of a good name that they will be able to use and pronounce well. Also, one of the American traditions is to name children after the older generation. For example, my middle name is the same as my grandfather’s name. This is a way of honoring him and remembering him. Unfortunately in my family, this is the seventh child to be born, my oldest sister has five and my second sister has two, so it seems all the relatives and older generation’s names have all been taken!!
If you have any recommendations for names of both girls and boys, please send them along. Chinese and English.
Michelle has continued to wake up in the middle of the night and munch on a few things and drink some water. At first, I woke up with her because she woke me up, but now she is really quiet and she won’t shake the bed too much. The baby is really doing a number on her appetite and her schedule. She is hungry all the time and wakes up quite often during the night. I don’t mind though, because I think it is good for me to share what she is going through. I mean, how difficult to go through this all by herself with nobody to help her or support her. We’re both learning a lot. We’re learning more about each other and about this new member of our family. Our Christmas gift is coming. Growing. Developing. Coming. Soon. Time will fly. But right now it seems like it is crawling.
Take a detour and read about FOOD during Pregnancy.
Go on to Month 4.